The deciding time

I have this tendency to overthink and overanalyze...everything.  I am not known for jumping into things quickly, (unless we are talking about vehicle purchase, jabs self in head with pencil,) without a good deal of thought and caution. 

I've been blogging for more than three years.  I began, thinking I would document bits and pieces of our daily life, and have a place to share pictures with family and friends.  I was sort of asleep to most of who I was at the starting line, and have grown into myself in such a comfortable, exciting way over the years.  My kids have grown much, and I've documented that.  We've had ups and downs, for sure.  And in the same, I've had to remain lip-zipped on a number of important fronts because I do blog using my real name, and most people who know us know at least that this site exists.

I've felt, over the last few months, that we've reached a new pace - as a family, and for me in my own role here.  My hands have become infinitely more full now with three children, and as I push for little to littler television around here, soon-to-begin homeschooling and keeping up with everyone's daily needs- mostly on my own as Kevin works so much of the time - I've been struggling for months to continue writing in this forum.  I have to let the kids watch tv or play play-doh or whathaveyou for a couple hours while the baby naps and my house goes generally to hell, just so I can get an entry published.  And I've been wrestling with a nagging feeling for several months, that it's time to go.

On the other hand, of course, I adore the relationships I've made in this online community of bloggers.  And how nice it is to post baby pictures, vacation pictures and the like and have friends give pats on the back, and advice, and support.  Who could ask for anything better?  Gosh I would miss that.

There are so many reasons to keep finding a way, and so many reasons to have one less thing on my plate, even if it is Me Time. 

I am going to step back from this place for the next month to sort things out a bit.  I plan to create an actual daily schedule that will work for my family, and prioritize in a way that mothers with young children are well-versed in doing.  And I'm going to see what it feels like to be away from here, and if it really is something I can part with. 

Lord knows I'm not looking for the answer for How To Do It All, And Well, in this place, but I couldn't dissappear for a long while without saying something first. 

 

My mother, she makes things so difficult... 

Comments

[crookedeyebrow]

I'll miss you and all those cute baby photos. I wish you lots of luck planning and how that you come back soon.

xoxo
CE

[rkmama]

Sounds like you have a great plan set in place. If it were me I would just try to do it all until I had a psychotic breakdown. Your way is infinitely better.
Good luck and all the best!

[Erica]

No, no, no, no...you can't leave:( I do understand. It does take up a lot of time and you actually put thought into what you write (mine is just crap) you are so funny and I love seeing your cute baby pics and , and, and....good luck and best wishes! Hope to see you soon.

[Jen L.]

Good luck getting things in order! Take the time you need. Maybe you'll figure it out and come back to us. If you go, I will certainly miss reading about you and your sweet family, but boy, oh, boy do I understand the need to re-prioritize sometimes! Take care, Molly.

[SJ]

I will miss you for sure if you do go, but being a Mom myself with so much on my own plate, I get it. I know where you are coming from.

Good luck getting things organized, I'll be here still if you decide to come back. And if you don't, well then. It's for the best.

Oh! One more thing. Marin is beautiful....

[Sant]

"After 42 years, we are closing our doors. We have loved being part of your lives." Insert tears (I was just starting to get over the Shop Around the Corner, too).

I will just keep telling myself that it will be okay. I like to think of your blog as hanging your A+ on the fridge in grade school. I will miss your stories and pictures, and your lovely writing.

I guess I will just have to catch up with you while I still live with you:)

And now I'll be less selfish-- I don't know how you shower daily with three children, much less to manage a blog, household, laundry, "field trips", the concept of retirement, and exponentially more daily. People pay money for skills like that. Go forward, grasshopper-- we shall meet again.

[Bethany]

I'll miss you and the babes but I know what you mean. At least you were nice enough to tell us, I just kind of dwindle to bi-monthly posting (if that).

Love ya.

[Laylabean]

Oh, I HOPE you don't decide to quit blogging but I certainly will understand if you do. I'll miss you though. :(

[Anne]

I miss you already...

[HollowSquirrel]

You know what you've got to do, and when and if you feel you're ready to return, we'll be here waiting for you! I love you and your family and wish you alll the best. If you need ANYTHING, you know where to find me. HUGS to the boys and Marin!

[Frema]

Why are you doing this right when I go back to work? What am I going to do with myself (besides cry at my desk over leaving my babies) (wow, that wasn't depressing at all)?

Seriously, I'll miss reading you this month. Good thing I've got your digits. :)

[Parsing Nonsense]

I know the feeling! Take as much time as you need, your family comes first! We'll miss you, though.

[Amy W]

Completely understand. I have had this thought a time or two (or three or four).

Good luck and keep in touch!

[Isabel]

Hey, you've got to do what you've got to do.

But, please know, YOU WILL BE MISSED.

[Tina]

I totally agree with Sarah's comment! you amaze me...I dont know how you do it all! you are a really good mommy! =) I will miss seeing daily pictures of everyone....but that just gives us an excuse to get together more often. love ya, freak. =)

[Cindy]

Being so far away, I looked foward to keeping in touch with the blog when I didn't have a mintue to sit and chat.

I will miss seeing the everyone, daily. Riley is sad you won't be posing pics of her "cousins".
Maybe this depature will be the kick in the ass I need to call you more often!!

Miss ya!

[The Bug]

I'll definitely miss you, but I can understand...I don't have HALF as much going on as you do and can't find time to blog. Just make sure if you leave and come back...you let me know when you're back!